In 2020 I was still on the road to recovery. The light seemed far off but I was catching glimpses of it. These days, I remind myself that I did reach it! And for all of you who buoyed me along, I’ll be forever grateful. You cannot possibly imagine what it meant to me. It’s easy to forget our blessings and get wrapped up in the chores of daily life. Like most of us, I’m guilty of this. So I’ve developed a morning routine. Before I get out of bed, I put my hands together and say thank you. A new day stretches before me and there are endless possibilities. I live in the countryside, there are chilli bushes groaning to be picked and the soaking rain has revived all the vegetation in the garden. Inherited Koi have decided to trust me and come up to the surface of their pond when they feel my presence. Actually, it’s probably the flakes they feel, but I like the first idea better.

Archie jumps through the bedroom window. He has established his dominance (for now) and is extremely proud of his new territory. A thick winter coat adds a certain majesty to his appearance and I can’t help feeling his immense pride in this new space. He is making for the roof now, where the kingdom can be surveyed. The big black tomcat needs to be kept at bay. Never a good idea to drop one’s guard.

Soon, my boy appears in the kitchen asking for his breakfast treat. Whatever I’m eating, he’ll have too. Well, he’ll taste it first. He’s a gourmet cat. I could learn this art. Only eat what you really love. Nothing else is worth the calories.

My dreams normally disappear in the morning mist. I do try to remember them but they slip away mostly. Not this one. It was last year’s. I stored it away. Today seems like a good time to revisit it and offer it to you as a gentle reminder. Some dreams do come true.

I’ve picked up the light at the end of the tunnel, where it narrows and then ends at the edge of a deep blue-black ocean. Waves lap up against the edges and I know that if I go through the tiny entrance, I’ll drop into the water below and never be able to surface. So I stop in time. The light is a round ball of shining yellow stars and I hold it in my arms. I walk back through the space and absorb them as I go. When I reach the other side, everything is in me and my hands are free. I pull the sodden wooden gate to close the entrance and walk towards the sun, along a golden path. On each side, there are baskets of gifts for me to choose from. Words, wisdom, peace, dance, love… I pick some and fill my arms with treasures. Then I continue… 

A golden spiral draws me in and I spin in the vortex. I spin faster and faster until I feel out of control. I want it to stop. It doesn’t. So I take a breath and push. And then I’m in a meadow. Ahead of me is a barefoot child, running after a buttercup butterfly. She’s laughing and her floral dress is hitched up on one side. Tiny yellow daisies pop through the long grass and I realize I am free. The spiral has disappeared into the ether…